This past weekend marked opening day for fishing season here in Connecticut. Seeing the announcement, I reflected on my childhood and what opening day meant. Each year, me and my father would wake up before sunrise, head down to Mike's Bait & Tackle in Voluntown, load up on shiners and worms and then it was over to Bruno's (now Sunny's) to stock up on drinks, grinders and chips (cheese puffs for me). Just as dawn was breaking we would head into Pachaug State Forest to hit some of our favorite fishing holes. I looked forward to this day each year. Special time with just my dad. A day when I was not just the only little girl around, I was the only female period. The shoreline was surrounded with dedicated fisherman and me, the little girl who always showed up the men by catching the most fish each year.
This memory has visited me every opening day for years, but this year it came to visit with a deeper meaning as I just returned home from a purposeful visit to Arizona. In the last 6 weeks, my father suffered two strokes, quickly forcing both him and my mother to face reality. My purposeful visit was to assist them both with this harsh onset. You see, my parents, much like the majority of Americans, have never had a Will or Health Care Proxy. For almost three years now, my parents have had access to a Pre-Paid Legal plan which provides them the ability to acquire these immensely important documents at no cost beyond their membership, but still, they had yet to fill out the 5 page form. This is not unlike many Pre-Paid Legal members who initially have all the intentions of obtaining their Will but then delay the task when faced with the many daily distractions that we all encounter.
For many other Americans, cost can be an issue when faced with the decision of paying their rent or mortgage versus purchasing pricey documents they don't plan to need in the foreseeable future. Cost, in my parents' case, was no longer and issue though, but like many, what you would think should be a mediocre task, is one of the most difficult forms they will ever complete. The form itself is quick and self explanatory, but it is the daunting task of facing the reality of death that causes the struggle or eternal procrastination of even the most sensible individuals.
The following is a list of some of the freedoms you choose to give away, not have taken away,
mind you, when you neglect your estate planning. A simple will is simply not enough and
expressing your wishes to your loved ones is not legally enforceable in any way. Everyone who
cares about her or his loved ones and wishes to minimize the suffering of those left behind needs
to create and maintain an up-to-date estate plan.
By neglecting to create and maintain an up-to-date estate plan, you voluntarily relinquish your
freedoms to:
1. name the people you want to be able to respond immediately in an emergency to legally step
in to care for your minor children if you are unable to do so either temporarily or permanently,
and avoid the possibility of having your children taken into child protective services and
temporarily placed in foster care until such time as the authorities can locate and approve of a
suitable alternative
2. name the people you want to permanently raise your minor children in the event of the death
of both parents and specify how you wish those people to raise your children according to your
values and beliefs
3. name the people you want to manage the financial affairs of your estate for the benefit of your
children and their inheritance, especially where they are very young minors, in the event of the
death of both parents, often not the same people you wish to physically care for and raise your
children, and avoid the potentially very expensive need for a court-appointed guardian for your
children's finances with the requisite regular reports to the court and associated accounting and
court costs which can eat up your children's inheritance over time
4. choose to whom, how, and when you want all of your assets (your home, your car, your
personal property, etc.) distributed upon your death, including at what age(s) you want your
children to receive their inheritance, which just might not be a lump sum distributed outright at
the less than fully mature age of 18
5. exclude anyone you would not ever want to raise your children but who might petition the
court and the court might otherwise permit to do so, for example, relatives who look good "on
paper" but about whom you have information to the contrary or from whose personal values and
beliefs yours diverge fundamentally
6. exclude anyone you would not want to receive distributions of your assets, for example,
family members from whom you are estranged or who might be financially incapable of
handling their own finances or have problems with gambling, drugs, alcohol, or be involved in
lawsuits or divorces to which those assets would be vulnerable
Even though the majority of us do not want to embrace the difficult task of having to face our inevitable future, it is one we all must face with a new understanding. It is not for us that we obtain these documents, but for those that we love and that we may be leaving behind one day. With all the options out there these days, there is no excuse to not have these documents in place for our loved ones. If mortality strikes before you have a Will in place you may leave your family fishing for answers...
By: Stacey Jimenez
By Stacey Jimenez at 7:03:34 Comments: 0
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